Monday morning started off a little rough this week.  Balto was so happy to see me after a long night of sleep that he busted my lip with his nose.  

Things are going well.  Rana arrived home safely from Syria tonight after visiting her mom for a month.  We missed her dearly but we are so thankful she was able to spend time with her family.  Kevin has had his hands full taking care of Laura, Daniel and helping me with Dad all month.  I'm sure no one is more happy that she is home than he is!  Here are a few pictures Rana sent me from her trip.  

Since I am so behind, I missed posting on Father's Day.  It was a really great day.  

After Mom died, I went through her drawers looking to find things to just feel close to her.  I found that Mom had a lot of really fun socks.  I can't believe I never paid attention to this!  I'm finding that wearing her socks is a fun way to feel a part of her with me.  Here are 2 of my favorites so far....

Butterflies.   Whenever I see butterflies now, I think of Mom. 

Sheep.  I wore these socks when I went to the Gynecologist of all places.  My Dr and her assistant couldn't stop talking about how cute they were.  They loved the idea of wearing Mom's socks to feel her with me.  

I found so many cute socks in her drawer.  I also plan on buying fun socks from now on as a fun tribute to Mom.  

Mom's hydrangea has been blooming in all of the colors this year.  I can't remember what color it was when we planted it but it is really showing off.  

How cool is that?  

Walking home after visiting Dad one afternoon, I found this lone mushroom.  Is it just me or do you think a little gnome lives here?  

If you read my blog at all, you know I have struggled with anxiety for my entire life.  I have had my share of counselors and therapists both good and sort of good.  I LOVE my current psychologist and plan on seeing her monthly until the end of time.  Over the years I have developed a phobia of having my blood pressure taken.  Dr K and I have decided to focus on EXPOSURE THERAPY to help me remain calm while I'm faced with the cuff.  I know it sounds absolutely ridiculous but I'm nervous just typing this.  I want to throw that monitor out the window and close all of the blinds.   The readings I get at home are usually excellent; it's the ones at the doctor's office that raise eyebrows.  White coat syndrome is real.  I'll update you on my journey and we can see if exposure therapy will work for me.  I have my doubts.....

Time Marches On

June 2021.  Can't we just slow time down a little?  I need to catch my breath.  It feels like someone very important fell off of the boat but we just keep moving away.  I'm trying to learn how to navigate life without the most important person in my whole world.  

Dad and I took another trip to the ER last week.  His jaw was hurting so badly that he thought he had broken it in a fall he had taken a few weeks prior.  He was diagnosed with a severely abscessed tooth.  The antibiotic he was prescribed is causing major burning in his esophagus and we need to get the tooth out.  The earliest I can get him in to see an oral surgeon is this Thursday, 7 days after his visit to the ER.  I'm going to try my hardest to get him in to see someone, ANYONE, tomorrow.  We are praying that his infection won't turn into Sepsis as he is now prone to.  Dad takes a blood thinner for his Atrial Fibrillation and that will need to be stopped before any surgery can take place.  

Some highlights (and a few lowlights) from the past couple of weeks:

Dad and I took a tour of some of his childhood memories...

I stepped in a yellow jacket nest.  By day 5 (pictured), the swelling was gone and the redness was starting to go away.  For days I thought the itch would drive me crazy!  Everything is all good now.  

I took over for Mom and visited my Uncle Harold's grave on Memorial Day.  Uncle Harold served in Korea and had actually returned from duty.  He volunteered to go back to the frontline with the Chaplain.  He played guitar for the church services.  Unfortunately, it was during this time that he was killed.  Uncle Harold was never far from Mom's thoughts.  

Firebirds, one of Mom and Dad's most favorite restaurants, gave free meals to Veterans on Memorial Day.  Rana made reservations for the family and we ate out with Dad.  The meal was lovely but it was very apparent that someone important was missing.  Normally, Mom and I would ride in the backseat and I'd take a selfie.  This year, I sat alone. 

I hired a personal trainer.  Crystal has a Doctorate of Physical Therapy.  On top of working full time as a physical therapist, she is a personal trainer as well.  I have a long way to go to get stronger but I'm going to put in the work.  I've had 3 sessions so far and I am feeling optimistic.  

I'm having an echocardiogram on Tuesday to check on my heart. My doctor informed me this week that I need to start doing "vigorous exercise".  Crystal is helping me with that as well.  

Rana is in Syria visiting her family for the month of June.  Meanwhile, Daniel has been spending a lot of nights with Papaw and Laura is busy with her sitter, Taylor.  Kevin has his hands full!  

Scott is still playing lumberjack and cutting down trees.  Blossom and Balto are living their best lives on the couch as I type. 

My eyelids are starting to close on their own.  It is time for bed.  

Goodnight.