I have long come to the realization that life is short.  I mean, really short.  Yesterday, I felt like I had been gut-punched with grief for my momma.  I miss her so much.  I wish we could go back to a time where she was able to go and do all that she wanted to.  I'd love to travel with Mom.  We'd visit all of the places she said she wanted to see but never did.  I'd hug her as tight as I could and breathe her in.  Oh how I miss her so.  I still can't wrap my head around the fact that I'll never see her again this side of heaven.    

Three weeks ago, we said goodbye to our Blossom.  It was horrible but she was becoming miserable.  Upon her diagnosis three years ago, the neurologist said we'd have her for about one more year.  We had three.  I've never known a dog with such spirit and fight.  Blossom was such a blessing to our lives and she took a huge part of our hearts with her.  

The week after her death, we had a sweet visitor for several days.  Dori was just what Scott, Balto and I needed to lift our spirits and help our hearts.  Thank you to my friend Miranda for sharing her with us.  

I don't know about you but I am struggling with all of the change in the world.  Between all of the change that the pandemic brought, the wars, gun violence, people being able to "choose" their gender, so much meanness, the influx of people moving into my city and changing it, illness, death - I could go on - I am struggling to make sense of the world we live in.  Not all of the changes have been bad; I do enjoy working remotely at times but I no longer feel like I understand (or like) the world we live in.  Life is hard.  

I'm trying to save my sanity and am trying to cut back on all types of media.  I want to limit my time viewing social media, news media and television/movies; you know, a simpler life.  I am learning to play the drums and am taking private French lessons with an online tutor from France every week.  I need to engage my mind.  I don't believe that we were created to consume so much information all of the time.  I'd love to go back to simpler times.  You will see me around here more often as I am choosing to channel my time and energy into different areas.  

Merry Merry!

Only 6 more sleeps until Santa Claus comes!  I'm sure he is checking over his list at this very moment.  

So much has happened in the past month and yet, so little.  Deanna, Christy, Miranda and I met yesterday to plan the Parkwood High School class of '91 30th year reunion.  Technically, it is now 31 years but you know...Covid.  Afterwards, we ate at Emmet's Social Club which is in the historic old mill in Waxhaw.  It was a great day.  

Christy took this photo of me and when I see it, I see my Mom.  Is it just me? 

Yes, I'm wearing my "Go Jesus, It's your birthday" shirt.  I'm sure that is only funny to people over a certain age.  

I am loving wearing Mom's socks...

And...I even broke out one of her most favorite coats.  She wore this one all of the time the past few years. 

Scott received a 15 year service award from Charlotte Radiology.  They asked him to send in a photo of himself holding the award.  He wanted the dogs in the photo.  Blossom obliged.  Balto had places to be. 

Deanna, Christy and I went to Waxhaw for a fun afternoon of food and shopping.  Miranda was supposed to join us; however, she was under the weather. 

For your photo viewing pleasure, I recreated my infamous (only to me) crawl across the Waxhaw Bridge during a 1978/79 class field trip to the fire station.  I was the only one in Mrs. Crawford's kindergarten class who was too scared to walk across.  I stayed in the back and crawled the entire way across.  My teacher assistant, Mrs. Hemby, and another student (Reagan Blythe) stayed with me.  

Mom's grave marker is in.  It is close to what I wanted except that the dogwood is just too large.  I wish it were smaller to look more proporationate to the cross.  I hope Mom would approve.  

There were so many things I wanted to say on the marker.  This like how she was the best mom & grandmother ever, her favorite Bible verse, that she and Dad were married 62 years.... I didn't.  The marker wasn't big enough to do her justice.  

Some photos of Laura just because.....

Daniel is still spending a lot of time with Dad.  He likes to sleepover on the weekends and now that he is out for Christmas break, he will be staying over a lot, I'm sure.  One morning I went over to wake Dad up and and I found this in his room.  This is so my Dad...

I hope that everyone is having a happy holiday season.  Work has been busy and Dad has been, well, Dad.  We have had a trip to the ER, the doctor and even a sigmoidoscopy.  He is a full time job on top of my full time job but I wouldn't change a thing.  Well, I wouldn't hate it if he married a Nurse.  LOL.  

Independence Day 2020 Style

While at my parents' house tonight, I noticed Mom was watching Christmas in July on the Hallmark Channel.  I guess we are halfway to Christmas now.  

The Paw Patrol is always on duty at my house.  

Time Flies

I can't believe how fast time seems to be passing.  Tomorrow, I begin my 8th week of working at home.  There are so many things that I love about working from home: sleeping late, not taking a bath, wearing pj's all day, not washing my hair, being with my dogs all day....  There are also things I can't wait to get away from.  Work.  I can't wait to get away from work.  Every time I pass my home office these days, I'm reminded of work that needs to be done.  Last week, I needed to use the high volume copier/scanner at the office so I went in for 3 days. It was glorious.  I so enjoyed leaving work behind and looking forward to getting back home.  It felt a little apocalyptic to be at the office after so many weeks.  All of my calendars were still set on March and full of appointments and events that never came to pass.  

Scott had to take 2 weeks of his vacation time and then was furloughed for 2 weeks from his job at Charlotte Radiology.  He starts work again tomorrow.  Contrary to the backups we've heard about on the news, Scott easily filed for unemployment online and received his first deposit in less than a week.   

Here's a quick recap of the past few weeks:  

I had a problem with squirrels jumping on my bird feeder.  Moving the feeder and waxing the baffle have taken care of that 100%.  

Daniel turned 11.  We celebrated with an outdoor pizza & cake party.

Next up... Dad.  Thursday, Dad turned 85.  We celebrated with Five Guys.

Dad checking his birthday wishes on Facebook. 

Dad sporting a button that says "My Daughter is #1".

Blossom has been struggling lately.  She clearly doesn't feel her back, left leg.  She walks like she is intoxicated and drags her foot.  It is hard for her to sit down and often, her legs get twisted up behind her. Thankfully, she is still able to walk, run & climb stairs.  Last night, when we got home from our walk and took her bootie off, her nail had rubbed raw and was bleeding inside of her bootie.   These are all symptoms that we knew in our heads were coming but we hoped in our heart wouldn't.  

She always has to be touching Scott.  :-)

Last Saturday, I was sitting on the front steps with Balto when he took off running after the neighbor's dog.  Their dog does not have a fence and I guess Balto heard her go outside.  I chased after him at full speed and landed on the concrete with my hands, knees and chin.  I thought I had broken my jaw as it was very painful and wouldn't close.  Due to Covid-19, I was too afraid to go to the ER.  Thankfully, it was much better the next day. Other than a few scrapes and bruises, I was feeling better after a few days.  

That brings me to today.  Today we had a wonderful treat.  My super amazing friend, Miranda, made a pound cake for my Dad.  She dropped by with her dog, Dori, and said hello.  Thank you so much Miranda! And Dori!  XOXO

Dad is wearing a new shirt that Kevin's family gave him for his birthday.

I washed and styled mom's hair today.  I did a better job than last time.  For the first time in her life, her white hair is growing out.  I covered it up with (a lot of) ColorWow powder and I think it looks pretty good!  

Here's mine:

Summer, Slow Down!

I can't believe that July is almost over already.  Where has the summer gone?  Lately, I've spent a lot of time in my car driving my mom to doctor appointments, hair appointments, and physical therapy.  Here are a few pictures from the past couple of weeks.  

You can usually find Daniel hanging around Papaw.

Girls Trip

I can't tell you how badly I needed a girls trip.  Last week was a roller coaster on top of the roller coaster that I'm already on.  The week started out well (Holiday!) and with us finally planning a family vacation that I never imagined might be a possibility ever again.  Dad went into atrial fibrillation on Wednesday and there were moments I didn't know if we were heading to the ER or not.   He is still in afib but the doctor put him back on some medication that will hopefully get that straightened out soon.  After checking in with Mom and Dad on Friday, I felt comfortable to go on a super fun trip to Seneca, South Carolina with my friend Miranda.  Miranda and I went to the same middle/high school but we really didn't know each other very well.  We have connected on Instagram and Facebook of all places. 

Miranda invited me to go with her to see Christian comedian John Crist.  I'm not usually a big fan of comedians but I absolutely love John.  I follow him on Instagram and love his videos.  He is hilarious.  

Funday Monday

I went out on Monday night. (Surprising, I know!) My friend, Miranda, invited me to see Heather Land at Ovens Auditorium.  I had never heard of Heather Land in my entire life.  Turns out, I was in the minority.  When I googled Heather Land, her Facebook page popped up with over 2 million followers.  It even said that 22 of my Facebook friends were following her page.  Who knew?  Certainly not me.  

Miranda, her friend Jackie (now my friend too), and I went to Lupie's Cafe for supper.  I had not eaten at Lupie's in...wait a minute....it was about 15 years ago after Scott had a colonoscopy.  He woke up, asked me how he had gotten dressed and said he wanted to go eat a chili dog at Lupie's.  I thought that was a rather risky thing to eat after his previous 2 days but, not MY colon.  

Back to last night.  Here are the 3 of us at Lupie's Cafe.

Room 67

We brought Dad home from the hospital on Friday.  Friday was hard.  It was so hard being back in the cardiac op area (I have no idea what that room is called).  It is basically a big room that has a large desk in the middle.  The desk is surrounded by many little glass rooms that have heart patients awaiting or recovering from procedures.  We were in Room 67.  Room 67 is next to Room 66.  That's the room where Dad "left this world" as the doctor called it. 

Everyone was so sweet to us.  The nurses and the doctors all came by to see Dad and talked about how nice he is.  The nurses told us that "that day" (August 17th) was a "very, very bad day".  They all remembered the room he had been in.  I assumed that what happened to Dad that day was pretty common - apparently it was not and they have not forgotten it.  

I can't tell you how hard it was to be there.  I could feel all of the adrenaline running through my arms and legs and I just wanted to run.  Thankfully, they said he was the perfect patient and his heart was back in rhythm after only one shock.  After hugs from all of the nurses, we were on our way back to the cardiac floor.  

Dad is home and in good spirits however, he just can't seem to get any strength back.  He is very weak and he actually fell in a plant yesterday.  He told me it was a comfortable plant though....

On a much more fun note.....  An old high school friend, Miranda, texted me on Friday night and asked me to go to Festival in the Park on Saturday.  We weren't close friends in high school - we knew each other - but we didn't have any classes together.   Miranda was much more popular than I was and was also in the smarter classes.  However, we have gotten in touch through Facebook and Instagram over the years and when I'm with her, I feel like I have known her my whole life.  A night out with a good friend was just what I needed.  

We enjoyed looking around but we didn't buy anything.  Wait, that isn't true...Miranda bought some kettle corn.  

For no reason at all, here are some totally random pictures from today.  

"How to Beg" by Blossom Lanford:

"How to Sleep on a Couch Properly" by Balto Lanford:

Looking forward to tomorrow night - I'm going to a party for a good friend who is celebrating her Re-Birthday.  It was one year ago tomorrow that she received a new heart!  She is a beautiful miracle.